Hi readers,
I'm doing an extra post this week because today is mental health awareness day and as someone who's suffered through a lot of mental health problems, I thought I'd take sometime to write about it.
I've had three lots of depression; one which was undiagnosed when was I fifteen -because everyone just thought I was unhappy at school, but on reflection and knowing what I now know it was clearly depression. One for a brief time when I left uni before returning to do my masters - I was upset that I had to close the door on what had been a great three years of my life and I wasn't sure what to do next. And my finally one which was about three/four years back now, when I couldn't get a job and I just wanted to give up on everything.
That most recent one was longer and more serious then the other two. I had to have pills and counselling. It all came about because after graduating I spent two years trying to get a job. The first year I told myself was like a gap year because I so needed the break and I did get stuff done and I was okay.
The second year though the job center and my parents were on my back a lot. I must have applied for 200 odd jobs that year and got hardly any interviews. I didn't want to do anything, everyone was putting me down, so why not agree with them? I begin to beat myself up over how worthless and bad I must be. I told myself that there must be something wrong with me. All my friends had jobs and were moving on with their lives and I was just stuck in the gutter. What was the point?
The job center told me I was depressed and I needed to see my doctor. I did and found out I was dangerously depressed and suicidal. It came as a shock to me because I'd not realized how bad my mental health was. I think that it happens to a lot of people, but they just decided to get on with it and keep it hidden. It's a hard topic to talk about and other people who've not had mental health problems can't always understand how and why people who are affect behave the way they do.
I've always been very talkative and I found that talking to my family and friends as well as the counselling did help. I started doing a lot more volunteering and found that I was getting into all the crafts and sewing at the youth center. I started to sew at home and discovered a liking for it. It became a hobby and it helped a lot of my depression. It give me something to focus on and do, which meant I wasn't thinking about stuff all the time and I had something of a purpose, because I'd then teach the kids how to do it. Then of course, I got a job and things have been pretty stable.
Well, until last month when I broke up with my boyfriend. I've been boarding on being depressed again. Some of the signs have been there; lack of motivation, being stressed, ill, feeling uninspired and putting myself down that I won't fall in love again. I decided that I just couldn't go backwards and I didn't want to get so depressed again, that's why at the start of February, I picked up the list of stuff I'd wrote down I needed to do at the start of the new year and began thinking and doing some of them. I still have moments - I guess it's going to take some time to get myself right again- but for now I'm doing okay.
My mum directed me to the Time To Change organisation because she thought it'd be good for me to run an activity on mental health with the 8-12 year olds I work with. I know that sounds a little young, but research is showing that a lot of young people are suffering with mental health problems. So, I thought it'd be cool to get the kids to make these folded claw things -that's what I call them! and talk about stuff with them.
I think that depression, anxiety and stress - both which I've also had bouts of- are the top mental health issues. I think it has something to do with the societies and lifestyles we now all have. But there's also other mental health problems like phobias, grief and panic. A lot of this just goes undiagnosed because people won't go see doctors or talk to people about it because they are embarrassed. Today is the day to change that. And I know it's hard because you don't want people to be mean or misunderstand you etc, but actually the first step of admitting you might have a problem will make you feel better and of course once the ball is rolling it's a lot easier!
Finally, I wanted to share this image below about stressing less. There's lots of things you can do when you're feeling stressed or having other mental health problems. Reaching out to people and getting the help and support you need is important and I think remembering these 10 points can also be useful.
So, I hope that whatever you're doing to do is good and that you've found reading this inspiring enough to either make that first step or help others. Until Monday. Thanks for reading and please check out my other blog; https://thestoryfiles.wordpress.com/
Images from:
http://www.time-to-change.org.uk/timetotalkday-resources
http://www.dailynewsservice.co.uk/mental-health-misconceptions/
http://historiasdeariadne.blogspot.co.uk/2015/08/os-piores-12-habitos-para-nossa-saude.html
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