June Life Update: Applying For A Passport

Hi readers,

I've never had a passport. That might sound strange to some but actually a lot of people don't have one. I've not had the need for one because the last time I left my home country - Britain- was in 1999 when I went to New Zealand. I travelled on my mum's passport and my two brothers went under my dad's because back then that's how children could travel. Now though, they have to have their own passports but since we didn't go anyway else and just had holidays in the UK, I didn't have the need for one.

The first time I looked at getting a passport was in uni because it was a good form of ID in bars and clubs, but it was expensive and a learner driving licence was cheaper plus getting that also meant I could learn to drive! A few years later, my best friend suggested a trip to Ireland and said I'd need a passport. I looked at getting one again but even discounting all the costs of getting one, I was a poor student and couldn't really offered to be travelling. Plus, I had also been diagnosed with my long term health conditions and I just had too much going on.

From then to now, I've been battling illness, finding a job and figuring out what I wanted to do. The wanderlust wasn't in me. Friends and family went travelling the world but that didn't inspire me. I love England, I like the weather and enjoy the rich history and different cultures here. However, I do have dreams of going to America, Canada, Japan and New Zealand again.

So, why now have I decided to get a passport? It's not due to Brexit and other political unrest and changes, like I've read other people are now scrambling to get one. It's because out of the blue my boyfriend decided to invite me to Sweden where his dad has a second house. My boyfriend is aware that I've never had a passport because last year he invited me to Brussels and I said no due to the no passport, ill health and still not having the urge to travel. When he asked me this time, I said no again but when I spoke to my mum after, she persuaded me that I should give it a go. My boyfriend and his dad are going to pay for everything, so money isn't the real problem.

The problem is my main long term health problem. It's better controlled now but unpredictable and highly embarrassing. At it's worse, I can't be more then a minute or two away from a loo and it's like having a stomach bug but ten times worse. Attached to it is all the psychological problems, stress and anxiety that make me worse. I've had my condition for about 13 years now and it'll never be cured, (unless have insides removed and that's only a very final option when everything else has failed and I give up the fight.) Even just small afternoon/day trips out can be tough! One day, I will write a blog post about this.

I know I shouldn't let that stop me from doing what I want and I do try hard but sometimes its all just too much. However, I've decided that I want to overcome this now. If I want to see those other countries I need to make some kind of start. So yeah, I've decided to apply for a passport and give it ago. Though one big down side is that the holiday is booked for 7 weeks from yesterday and it takes 6 weeks for a passport to be delivered and there's no getting around that due to the fact I've never had one before.

So, I spent Wednesday researching how to apply, what I needed and what all my options where. I decided that due to the fact I'm doing it on my own as my parents are still in France this week, I would do 'check and send' with the post office. They make sure you've filled the form in have all the right documents then send it off for you. If changes are needed they tell you and you can come back as many times as needed. That seemed to suit me better then just doing it all online because you still have to print stuff and post everything special delivery. They do change more, but that includes the postage and checking meaning it's highly likely to be put straight through.

I went to the post office, got the form I needed and all the instructions about what to do. Which turned out to be real simple. I just needed my birth certificate, both my parents' birth certificates, their passport information for the form and two correct photos. I also needed someone to countersign the form and a photo which my supervisor has agreed to do today. Luckily for me, I have all that and with me and my parents being British and them having passports, it means I don't need other information.

However, it turned out that my birth certificate has gone missing! I've now spent about 8 hours searching my house for it and it's no where. So I've fast track ordered one and it should be here Monday. Then all being well I can send off my application.

My next hope is that they don't call me for interview! It's not compulsory but highly likely I might have to go due to never having a passport before. If they do send me a letter, I'm going to go for the next available appointment and I'll be able to take my mum as she'll be back home by then. I'm nervous about getting the questions wrong, especially if they ask me for my parents' birthdays and marriage date because I'm no good with remembering numbers.

I read that it's not like a test and many people get things wrong but they still get through. When I book my appointment I shall explain all my needs and see if my mum can come in with me. Hopefully, that'll go fine then in a few days after I should get my passport. Most of the chat room / message boards etc I've looked at to help better under what people have had to do and the timelines say that all together it takes 4-5 weeks. Though one person had said it took 4 months for them. But I'm hoping there's no issues and it'll be plain sailing.

Then I better get everything else sorted, pack and prepare myself! It's going to be so weird and my  
anxiety is going to go through the roof. I have no fear of planes and I do like travelling and seeing new things, but like I said my health is a stopping factor. Perhaps, though this what I need to do to prove to myself that I can't allow my health problems to hold me back. I'm actually excited too, this is going to be a great experience and it'll open the door to so much more.

 Stockholm, Sweden.

(All images from: https://pixabay.com and https://www.pexels.com)

Please check out my other blog: https://thestoryfiles.wordpress.com/

January 2016 Update: January Blues

Hi readers and welcoming to my first post of 2016! 

It's taken me a couple of weeks to get around to writing this, but I've had my reasons, which I'll go into later. Firstly though, I was reading a magazine the other day that January is the worst time of year because we don't have anything to look forward to unlike the other months. Plus, its the deflate after Christmas and New Year because you've eaten and drunk so much, spent lots of money and had a ton of fun. Now, it's back to work or education with little money and feeling like you over did everything. Also, your New Year resolution has probably gone completely out of the window.

January and February always feel the hardest months to get through for me. It's cold and snowy- though I seemed to have missed nearly all the bad weather so far- and it's getting dark so early. Getting out of bed is super hard for me and I do tend to hibernate like a bear during winter. I'm not big on going out either- unless its snowed and it looks nice-because everywhere is muddy, wet or icy. And its so cold and though I do like walking, the weather has to be decent. 

My health, which hasn't been good in years, also doesn't like the winter weather. I've been a bit bad recently with things and something keeps triggering my asthma. I've no idea what it is, but my chest has been giving me lot of grieve. I've had to take strong painkillers for my other health condition and the side effect of that is that I want to sleep all the time. Also, my iron level has been down again, making me tried and grumpy. I've been trying to start eating better to help all this issues and to loss some weight, but my other side effect is that I don't feel like eating and I become sick and nausea, making things harder.       

Thankfully, I'm feeling better today though there is another event which has triggered these problems and I'm still struggling to deal with. I broke up with my boyfriend last Monday. He sent me a message about it then when we spoke I officially ended things. I was really mad at him because we'd just been to my brother's birthday meal on Saturday and spent Christmas and New Year together. I felt he'd just thrown that all way and it was like it didn't mean anything. I know that's not true, but I couldn't help but feel that way. We weren't meeting each other's needs and what I now want is different to what he wants because we are both at different stages really.     

It's real difficult because we were together 3 and bit years and I thought 'd found the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. We never argued and were very close, we had enough in common and everything seemed to be good. I think though he kept this doubt about things between us and he let it grow and come out again. Will we get back together? Not anytime soon. He remembered what I had stated the last time we broke up and got back together, that if we broke again then a good amount of time, in which we dated other people and progressed more with our lives needed to happen before we decided if we should get back together. I think that's the best thing to do really. 

A lot of people give me the classic advice of 'if one door closes another opens,' and 'if it's meant to be it'll find away,' I told my dog- who I've been talking to a lot and been seeking comfort from- 'there were plenty more fish in the sea' and 'it really wasn't the end of the world.'  Sometimes though the classics catchphrases are just what you need to reassure yourself with. I'm going to miss him, no doubt about that, though he won't completely be out of my life. There's still Dungeons and Dragons and he did say he wanted to stay friends. I don't know how I really feel about that at the moment, but what I do want is for there to be a neutral line between us. I want to be mature and calm about it. I know that's going to be so hard to do, but I've got to come out of this stronger now, I don't have any choice. 

I was watching the birds in the garden this morning and I was thinking how that the blue tits, the robin and the sparrows have to live in the current moment. So much of their time and energy is spent finding and eating food. Winter is the hardest month for them and yet they find the will to carry on. They don't seem to have that many worries but for getting the basic needs sorted and it made me think about everything I had to appreciate. My basic needs have been met and exceeded, I've had a good life, been luckier then other people and yeah, even though I'm not rich and famous - which is probably over rated anyway, I'm doing okay. 

I wish my life was as simple as that of a bird's though. Humans compared to all the other animals live complicated, stressful and worry filled lives. The idea of going back to basics does attracted me, but I guess that would mean going to a small island with nothing on it and trying to survive. A Robinson Crusoe situation, but I couldn't cope without my books!        

Whilst watching the birds I also noticed that the snowdrops and bluebells were coming up in the garden. Though it feels far to early for plants to become up, it seemed the mild winter is causing then to appear. The splash of green in the bare brown garden, made me feel happy. Everything moves on and keeps on turning, things happen for many reasons and the world is full of goodness. I guess I just feel like nature is reminding me that things have their time and place, life just carries on. 

I feel little bit better after writing all of this now. Having time to reflect is important and I know it's going to take awhile before I move on again. My lack of motivation and wanting to do things will fade and for now I'm just going to do the small things and take little steps. Hopefully, I'll meet someone else soon. It is a big world out there after all. 

I found this last image on another site and I just love it. It really fits in with what I've been writing about too. I thought it looked like a nice thing to finish on. Till next time. 

Images from: 

https://pixabay.com/

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/c3/fe/d0/c3fed0cd1cce09f81cf7a24cf5b48330.gif