It's all about the windows!

People think I'm being funny and just ranting over nothing but my dad has now decided to get rid of our wooden frame, stain glass windows and go for plain plastic, double glazed ones. I love my windows, they've been a part of my life for 20 years now and they make the house, my house! and my room, my room! without them it just won't be the same! And the other problem is my window shape just won't be the same! Anyway, the other problem is because of the way my room is there's no way you can really get to the window (Picture a box, if you will-slightly elongated at the ends and a window is at one end. Now the window has two large windows at the bottom and two smaller windows at the top with a cross like shape in-between them. then in front of the window there is the end of a high bed, with a large wooden desk under it. Then on the other side is a bookcase, full of books bottom and top.) So Today I had to make some room for the guy to come and measure up the windows and the only way he could do that was for me to move my bookcase, so I first made my bed and moved everything off my floor and then I emptied my bookcase and then moved it into my brothers' room. then my dad tells me that my window sill must be emptied too! and what have I just done with all my books/dvds? stacked them in the only space I can reach the far end of my window sill from. So I had to clear the other corner and then I slightly moved everything forward. So now hopefully a tape measure can go in the gap. So that's done! but when they come to fit the windows my room will have to be emptied and stripped. So I know my room needs to be tidy and stuff for all my uni things to go in there, so I'll use that to do this, but it now seems I'm going to be at uni till I must move out Sunday 28th June, because I don't want to be round when they do the windows....it'll be just too heartbreaking for me and I won't be able to sleep in my room before and after too. My brothers' will have to sleep in the tent outside and my parents in the living room. So I'm having to stay, which really doesn't bother me because at least the choice has now been made for me! The other thing is that hopefully the windows will be fitted on Thursday/Friday which is my last days at uni anyway, in time for me to move back and also for my birthday party!!!!! which is on Saturday 4th July 2009. My birthday's on the Thursday 2nd July!!!!!!!!!! So hopefully everything will go okay there! I know it has to be done but it hurts and I'm trying to make people understand but its hard.......mum and dad understand it-they like our windows too-but of course there are some good sides to the new windows 1. no more painting the frames, easily clean and no rotting/leaking, keeps warm air in, looks nicer/more modern and of course the house can be sold for slightly more if the time ever comes.
So I'm glad to be back at uni now -no more cleaning and fighting! I can just look after me, which is so what I need right now! anyway plans for tomorrow have been set -watching the Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy!!!! Should be fun and I can spend the next four weeks loving my crazy student life of my first year.

Freedom!

Hey, my exam is now over! It went okay really, the questions were suitable to what I'd been studying and well I wrote like three pages on each question and I stuck to the points and stuff, so hopefully I'll have got enough marks to pass now. The exam was also my last thing of my first year. Seems to have gone by so quickly... must be all the parties and late nights! Anyway, it seems kinda sad that everyone is packing up to go home and we won't be living together any more. :( It's like another chapter has been turned in the book of life and though it can be read again it can never really be re-lived. But I don't think I'd really change any of it. I've grown so much just being here and discovering stuff about myself, its funny to think that there was a time-only like 2 years ago! when I decided uni really wasn't for me and I'd never go.....I wonder what would happen if that had been my thinking in the spring of 2008? and where I would be now because I wouldn't be sitting in my room, in my hall, on campus, with my best friend sitting in my bean bag chair beside me and the knowledge that being writer was my purpose in life and what I was born to do. Because it really is, I've decided that now, I doubt I could try to be anything else and why should I not just give into what I want to do? Even if nobody publishes my stories or reads them as novels -not just on a computer screen, I'm only truly happy when I'm writing now.
Many people said I should become a teacher because I just look and seem to be one, but though I knew that it's an option, to me teaching has never seem to be me-it's not who I want to be! Same with my first goals to be come a vet or do some other job with animals- that's not me any more and well though I'd love to be the lead singer in the world's greatest heavy metal band ever and be madly in love with the base guitarist and for him to be madly in love with me, I know that's only a fantasy and very unlikely to ever happen. So I must now follow my heart and take up my gift of writing and use it to make myself happy.
Well, it least I now have the whole summer ahead of me to do such a thing. I might even be tempted to get something published this year!

May's First Post

I've been busy finishing off my last essays these last two weeks and luckily I manged to get everything in last Friday! So now that's all done I just need to revise for Eng lit 2 exam and really I'm not looking forward to that. Its not the exam itself because I hardly get scared or stressed about exams, my motto with them has always been just as long as you've revised and you've tried your best on the day, that is all you can do and you should be proud of yourself. For this exam its more of the subject; I've just got a problem with theory, its complicated and hard to understand it, therefore I hate it and this has been the circle for me now. I've no choice now, so I'm going to revise and just try my best. So all the teaching on my course finished on Friday so at least Ive been able to see the whole year through. I'm pretty sure I've passed the year too, as I've not failed any essays and my marks have been around the 60 mark and I've been told repeatedly that they lower the marks slightly to make you do better next year. They also wipe all your marks out at the start of next year too and though I know the marks this year don't count, I'll still feel like they are a part of me but I'll use them to make my other essays better. Next year counts a hell of a lot and I know that I must try harder and just spend more time doing my essays.
Right now, beside my revising, doing some personal reading and writing, I've no other plans for the rest of the day. The weather's not so great outside and I plan to go to the market tomorrow anyway. I'm staying the weekend at uni to revise and luckily my best friend is staying with me! So undoubted we'll be busy planning my novel and wondering which movies to watch.

Is it writer's block or is my brain just not working today?

Once again my uni work is giving me some trouble. I'm really struggling to write my crit theory essay. It didn't help that all the books I needed had all ready been taken out of the LRC and my tutor demand to see a plan with a draft by next lesson. My mind keeps wondering to other things and I just seem unable to form the words to type on the blank screen, which seems to be taunting me with its whiteness. The fact I also feel sleepy and perhaps coming down with something.... also doesn't help me. I wouldn't really mind the fact I can't write it but it also seems to have effecting my other writings and with my normal stress reliving technique gone, I'm find that its worrying me a lot more then it should be. It the minute I'm feeling kind of numb, sort like I've no energy and the world of nice dreams and relaxing is calling to me. I've a day left for my essay, it can wait just a little longer, maybe its time to let the wings of sleep bore me away to a place of no worries?

Crazy uni essays!

Like most good students I try to plan ahead with my essays. You know, get them done the week before so if I have a workshop class on them or because I need the time to go back through it before submitting it. So today I was sure I was on top of my 4 essays for creative writing and my 1 for English lit but then I discovered on top of my exam for Eng lit 2, I also have a 2000 word essay to write! I couldn't believe it! Suddenly my plan was thrown out of the window, I've had to postpone my nights of partying and hanging out with my friends, just so I've got the time to write the essay. To add to my worries I thought I'd got my two module reflections for both my creative writing classes sorted, but it turns out that I've made a really mess of them and now must spend tonight rewriting them! I doubt this will take my long though, but still it is work I don't really want to do right now! They need bibliographies though. My other two essays are stories and well due to a workshop yesterday my 1st story of 1000 words had to get rewrote because people just didn't get it and were confused. I rewrote it yesterday and today rewrote my self-assessment too. That one is now done! My second one was turning a song into a story and I've done this, but it might need redrafting again and I now think I've lost the self-assessment and bibliography on my main computer too now. More work to do there and oh, don't get me started on my essay for English. Its a presentation too and well beside from the intro and a rough plan, I've not done anything else on it. That'll be my task for the whole of tomorrow now. So my essay for my other English class is about a theory of lit in one of the books we've studied. I've decided to do some poems and write about feminism, because I've not wrote about it before and the rules about doing my exam paper are just crazy! Like you can't write about one theory if you've used it in the critical essay or in the question above. They like to make things hard don't they?
I know its uni and is meant to be harder than every other eduction stage but really, its only my first year and I've had a lot to learn, take in and party, so I don't really need a difficult last two weeks of teaching now. But there is nothing I can do about it, so I'll drag on and just hope that there's some luck on my side to pull me though it.

History and the future in the making

In the post below is my short story that I've written for my last piece of fiction work. It's just over a 1000 words and is as the title suggests about a master thief who changes his colours so he can kind of protect the world from finical disaster. Anyway, I'm eager to think what people out there think of it, so just let me know! It's the first time I've done this too so I'm kind of scared about it but I've been listening alot to people who think that I can really get into publishng my stories by puting them on the internet, I hope it works! They suggested some more sites so I'll be going to look at them too but remember it was first put on here! :)
Not alot has happened since my last post early. My mum finished off my jumper and now I've only 3 days left till I return to uni! So happy, can't wait to catch up with everyone....though the dread of packing is slowly getting to me. that'll be a task for tomrrow now. I might stop writing this and let you get on with reading my story.

The Colours of a Thief

The street lamps flickered on; their light fell upon the cobble stones as the trickling water from the fountain echoed in the town centre. The shops were closed; except for one whose neon light flashed; ‘Ma’s Café’.
Outside a blue car was parked, rusting away, but it did its job with pride. A tall figure sat behind the wheel, a wide brim hat pulled down over his eyes.
Running footsteps broke the silence and the man’s feet held steady on the cobbles as he rounded the fountain. He glanced over his shoulder. His breathing was deep and his right arm ached from carrying the heavy carpet bag.
A pack of German Shepherds burst into the town centre behind him. The dogs’ loud barking echoed and blood lust was in their eyes.
He turned the corner and stopped dead in the empty road.
The dogs’ barking increased and he spun on his heels to face them. Switching the carpet bag hand and drawing a gun from his hip. He knocked the safety off and squeezed the trigger.
The car quickly pulled beside him and stopped.
He paused.
As the first dog rounded the corner, he tore open the door and throwing himself into the passenger seat. The dog jumped against the door causing it to slam shut in his face. Huge jaws snapped at the window but the car screeched off leaving the dog howling in pain.
*
Ma Clancy crossed the floor, a coffee tray balanced on her hip. She stopped at a table were four men wearing black suits sat talking in low voices, “Here you go boys,” Ma’s voice called out.
An old man looked up from a newspaper. He had been studying a photograph of a young woman and the headline ‘Big Boss’s Daughter Missing.’
“Look out there,” he said.
Ma heard him as she walked past. She looked out of the window and saw the town centre covered in police officers. She placed her hands on her hips and pouted, “They’ll be in here next demanding coffee and donuts! You take my word for it!” she snapped.
The old man chuckled.
The four men stood up. One of them indicated to Ma with a nod of his head that they were going out the back door. She responded with an answering nod.
*
“Will ya get that gun out of my face?!” Sassoon snapped, hitting the gun.
“Sorry,” Felix muttered and then his tone changed, “and were where you? I said Thompson Avenue!”
Sassoon shrugged, “I misread the sign.”
Felix mumbled something. He slipped his gun back in its holder and kicked the carpet bag farther into the foot well.
“I was this close to being ripped to shreds, Sass!” Felix shouted, waving his fingers in Sassoon’s face.
“I was there, Felix,” he answered and then turned the wheel suddenly.
The car tore around a sharp corner. Sassoon’s seat belt restrained him but Felix was thrown against the window.
“Did you have to do that!?”
“I can’t help it. It’s the way the road is.”

The car drove out of town and into the forest. The headlights shone onto the little used, winding road. The side of a fallen tree caught the light and the car stopped at the end of the track.
Felix opened the door and stepped out, grabbing the bag. Sassoon followed him and they started to walk towards the cottage.
Sassoon glanced back, “We’re forgotten something,” he said, but Felix didn’t hear him.
He walked to the boot of the car. He unlocked and opened it.
The woman’s terror filled eyes met his. Her hands were tied together and she was gagged, leaving her struggling to breathe.
“Out you come,” Sassoon said.
He carried her towards the cottage, coming up behind Felix has he stepped inside.
“You should have left her there!” Felix snapped and he disappeared into the kitchen.
Sassoon went into the living room, placing the woman on the sofa. He pulled the cloth out of her mouth and she gulped down air quickly.
“How you feelin’, Miss Navarra?”
“Untie me Sass,” she whispered and held out her hands.
Sassoon nodded.
Felix appeared in the doorway.
“Ah, my ex-love! Been robbing banks again have you?”
“Of course,” Felix replied, sarcastically, as he entered the room.
“They are going to find you….”
“That’s what I’m waiting for.”
“And what do you plan to do?” she laughed.
“Let them take me,” he answered, “and then I’ll kill him.”
“I still don’t like it,” Sassoon mumbled.
“It’s the least he deserves after kicking us out! If there was more time…..” Felix clenched his hands.
A loud knock at the door interrupted the conversation and they fell silent. It was quickly followed by another as someone attempted to kick the door down.
The four men burst into the living room, large guns pointed out before them.
*
The large desk dominated the room. The chair had its back to them as they were pushed forward with guns at their backs. The door closed and the chair turned slowly around.
“Nice to see you again…Felix, Sassoon.”
Felix eyed the Boss and his hand drifted to where his gun used to be.
“Kidnapping Ren was low…” the Boss tapped his fingers together, “Where’s the bag?”
Sassoon raised his eyebrows and shot Felix a look.
Felix felt a gun dig into his back, “What bag?” he asked innocently.
“Let’s not play games, Felix….”
“Ah, the bag....I lost it.” he answered.
“I don’t believe you. Where have you hidden it? Tell me!”
Felix shook his head, “So you can use them to take over the world?”
“That’s none of your business,” The Boss snapped.
“Oh, I think it is! I was the one who collected them all! I travelled the world for you, gathering them, being your puppet! But not now! I won’t let you do this....”
“So you’ll do it instead, Master Thief?”
Felix gritted his teeth, “I’m not a thief.....” he yelled and spun around.
He kneed the man behind him and grabbed the falling gun. He fired two shots and screaming echoed in his ears.
“Let’s go!” he yelled.
He and Sassoon bolted out of the door in a hail of bullets.
“Head to the cars!” Sassoon shouted, “I’ll get us out of here.”
They arrived at the car park before anybody else. Quickly Sassoon slipped behind the wheel of a Mercedes and started the engine. Felix scrambled in beside him. Sassoon put his foot down and the car shot off, leaving the sound of guns firing in its wake.

An hour later the Mercedes sat outside the cottage. Sassoon and Felix were filling the blue car with their stuff.
“Got everything?” Sassoon called, as he poked his head around the kitchen door.
“Just this,” Felix answered, tapping the open carpet bag.
“Do we really need the money?”
“It’s not money, my old friend...it’s more of a way of getting it.”
Sassoon’s face became puzzled, “What’s in the carpet bag, Felix?” he asked.
Felix smiled, turned the bag upside down and the dull thud of papers hitting the table rang in their ears.
Sassoon pulled a sheet over to him; his eyes scanning the blue lines and the title at the top. His mouth fell open and Felix’s smile grew wider.